the dark of night

I've just got back from an amazing two week holiday to India - I'll write a separate post about it soon. Partly because there is so much to tell and partly because since I've been back, I feel like a total zombie and can barely think straight thanks to a mixture of jet-lag and insomnia. I've suffered from both before but it's amazing how quickly you forget just how hellish it can be. Not that my holiday wasn't worth it but I would like to sleep for more than a few hours a night now please. 


I've never been one of those people who can sleep anywhere at anytime, (although I've always wished I was), but I'm not normally this bad. Falling asleep is totally natural but as soon as you start being aware that you can't, it becomes downright impossible. It's an odd feeling, being awake in the middle of the night when it feels like the rest of the world is sleeping (easily). 


I woke up at 2.30am this morning and once I got passed the frustration and irritation of still being awake, tried everything else I could think of to get back to sleep. Meditation, warm glass of milk, reading a book, trying to breathe slowly and deeply, lie still and think of nothing. None of them worked. Worryingly, I seem to have had reverse jet-lag where I'm waking up earlier and earlier each night, not later. Anyway, today I have promised myself a trip to Boots to see if I can buy an over the counter something to help me. I'm not really an advocate of sleeping pills but if they can help me just get a few more hours so I start to feel more human and less clumsy, I reckon it's worth a go. Especially because we're coming up to one of the busiest times of year at work and I need to be sharper than I currently feel. At least my recent long haul flight has confirmed that I'm the right career; I have no idea how Pilots and Air hostesses cope with all those time zones. But then a job in the airline industry was never going to be for me - I really don't like flying.